i just realized why my arms hurt more recently. i recently ordered 7 lb. weights (i've been lifting 5 lb.) and i've just recently been lifting them. so that's more than likely the reason why my arms feel sorer than usual. i thought it was something like muscle tone increasing in my arms until i just remembered how sore my arms felt right after lifting in particular.
i've been talking to my brother lately and to tell you the truth, i believe him over my sister and mom anyday. we were talking about my mom and he said something about how she expects to get anything done drinking pepsi and smoking cigarette after cigarette. that surprised me because my sister had claimed that she got my mom to stop smoking because she told her if she smokes, she's not allowed to see her grandchildren anymore. i believe jay also because both my sister and mom are liars. i can't remember a time my brother lied to me. also, my mom is a chain smoker, so her just quitting smoking because her daughter told her to (narcissists don't listen to anyone else if it's not going to benefit them immediately) is a little unbelievable. i'm pretty sure she's been smoking for at LEAST 30 years.. doesn't matter if your daughter tells you to do something- it would take more than that for a lot of people. she's a shitty person like my sister. my sister pushed her own grandma on her ass after my grandma told my sister's boyfriend not to order my sister around. talk about grateful. my grandma was also going to help my sister get her diploma again and even bought her a computer to do it online.. what did my sister do? PAWN IT OFF FOR MONEY TO BUY SYNTHETIC MARIJUANA FOR HER AND HER BOYFRIEND, OF COURSE! that's a reason why my sister can NEVER count on me for help. she'll just push me on my ass and laugh about it with her boyfriend like she did to my grandma. "people change".. ok.. it's been LONG enough since she did that shit and she STILL hasn't managed to figure out a way to get her damn diploma again. she can't tell me it isn't possible for a person to get their diplomas when they drop out at 12 because my friend avrial went to summit and got his damn diploma again AFTER dropping out when he was in his teens PLUS he went and got his medical admin. assistant certificate. IT CAN BE DONE. my grandma told me on the phone one night how i was a good person and i shouldn't let people take advantage of that. so time for some TOUGH LOVE, AMY. you're smart enough to push an old lady who had nothing but good intentions on you.. you MUST have somethin up your sleeve! it's kinda boring with these football games that don't really have any teams i like on. i might just turn it to BET.
the thought of what people might be saying and doubting that my mom is trying to weigh me down with her. "you've been through so much! your own mom would never do that to her own daughter!" yeah.. explain the two surgeries i've had on my abdominal organs because of trauma to my abdomen and explain to me how she never mentioned ANYTHING about me getting kicked by my dad while i was in her arms and EXPLAIN THE TWO SURGERIES I'VE HAD TO HAVE ON MY BOWEL BECAUSE OF DAMAGE AND TRAUMA CAUSED TO THEM. my mom has NEVER mentioned a thing to me about that because she's too afraid to take accountability and she's a selfish narcissist. it just sucks that i have to get stuck with such an asshole as a mom. doesn't concern other relatives! it's not their problem, so just condone this shit!
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